Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Anxiety - The Mood In Meaning

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBs-cZs9m8U&feature=autoplay&list=PL93EBF4D907CBB6CD&lf=BFp&index=3&playnext=3

I sat in the chair for two hours today thinking about how physically alone I am. I sat and stared, and thought of nothing. Two hours. For those of you who have never tried it before, well, as the great Dr. Gonzo would say about his drug and alcohol induced, depraved and self indulgent lifestyle, “ I wouldn't recommend sex, drugs or insanity for everyone, but they've always worked for me.” And now here I am writing about this odd journey of insignificance transmuting the empty non-firing neurons into something else that is perhaps worthless. Scribble. Journal. The filling of the blank page.

(Irony is an dish stacked full of foie gras served to starving migratory geese.)

Hey, that should be the title of my life achievement book (that I will never write.) But the paper back would have to be a foldout like the honorary section of a Playboy or Hustler magazine. The jacket itself will sell a million copies alone to the A, B and C-class of the morally corrupt who just might use it as another false sense of hedonism and perhaps a dampening to their upward spiraling conceptional spore, or giz. Or whatever you younglings call it today.

(“Mook” being my personal favorite.)

Okay fine. I won’t smear anymore nonsense into this entry for you (switching to vodka now.) How about a pinch of philosophy, eh? I…..believe philosophy is the fundamental study of humanities finite situation. Definition? It is a daily deconstruction of the human body, mind and belief and albeit, soul that will one day be the delight and culinary experience of the terrestrial worm. A being towards death, if you will. Now there are some in-betweens such as the idea of dogmatism and it’s various attempts to hold onto certainty, dialogue and ideology.

(Yeah, I love fairytales too.)

Then there is democracy or institution or domination, whatever you want to label it as, who’s soul blueprint and outcome is the rendering of the elite and the classification of social status and the accountability to the citizens or to the civilization in which they‘ve built to their liking.

(What ever happen to meaning?)

Meaning is a subject that is in constant negotiation for me. Or maybe it’s the search for the idea of non-meaning that is lacking, hence the two hour chair mind-meld session today. Perhaps the answer lies in the contingency of understanding the absolute of being.

(……….and love?)

……………………………….....................................................................................................................................................dark chocolate………………………………..copious amounts of dark chocolate.

2 comments:

veraicon reality said...

ur fucking mind is brilliant. if your words were a lover... ugh... blah blah... won't go there tonight.

Jesus Harold Christ said...

my mind only looks good on paper.......as the saying goes